WATTS Women Aspiring Together To Succeed

 IMPORTANT

Sunday, August 29th 

2:30 pm - 5:30 pm

We will be reviewing Happy For No More by Marci Shimoff.  Letitia  recommended the book and will lead us in a discussion about it.  

 

We look forward to Letitia facilitating what will be an insightful exchange of ideas.

Below is a editorial review of Happy For No Reason from Amazon.com

According to the World Health Organization, the year 2020 will see depression become second only to heart disease in terms of the global burden of illness, a sad state of affairs that motivational speaker Shimoff believes can be changed by learning to cultivate "a happiness that's beyond reasons and that's here to stay."

Happiness at the last WATTS gathering!

Happy For No Reason offers exercises and quizzes which gives readers practical steps to stay happy.  Please download and bring you a free copy of the workbook, click here.

    

 

More happy faces from last gathering!

As usual, we are inviting everyone to contribute to the appetizer/refreshment table by bringing their favorite dish or dessert.  As usual, please bring only light-colored beverages, like 7-Up, lemonade, Sprite, ginger ale, water, etc and refrain from bringing dark colored drinks, like fruit punch and Coca-Cola.  

Great discussions!

Interesting topics!

Please plan to arrive at 2:30 for dining and socializing. We will start our program around 3:15 and finish at 5:00.  Then we will have an ½ hour of networking, ending at 5:30.     

Wonderful networking!

If your interested in coming please send me an e-mail to www.theessenceofone@gmail.com

Is a Good Woman Hard to Find?

I found this article on www.madamenoire.com and I loved it and I thought I would share.

 
According to some men, finding a good woman isn’t as easy as we would like to believe. We often hear complaints, from our girlfriends or even ourselves, about the lack of quality men in the choosing pool. Well, news flash ladies, some men have the same argument. Just because you’re educated, self-sufficient, and consider yourself a ‘trophy,’ doesn’t mean men are as impressed as you think. Actually nowadays, those characteristics are more prevalent than not.

We look at the women around us who are just as beautiful, educated, and self-sufficient as ourselves and think men have it easy. But emotional baggage, gold-digger qualities, over-independence, e.t.c. are characteristics we may overlook but men notice. So yes, your college-educated, independent best friend is both attractive and on the market but what about those qualities that even you as a best friend can’t stand? For the sake of this article, let’s reverse the roles. If you were a man, would you date your girlfriends? Let’s take it one step further, would you even date yourself?

Last week, self-proclaimed bad boy of radio, Michael Baisden raised this question to his female callers: would you date your girlfriends?  Many of the callers’ answers were shocking, but more relevant than most of us ‘got it together’ women would like to believe. One woman strongly emphasized that although she loved her friends, she wouldn’t date any of them. The reasons: either they were too independent or not emotionally independent enough. Another lady confessed that most women are sneaky, conniving and looking for a man to ‘save them’ (so much for women sticking together).

In today’s society when most women are financially independent or at least on the path to becoming so, many men have become accustomed to beauty, education, financial independence, etc. What many men are complaining about has nothing to do with the superficial. Instead, it has everything to do with emotional stability, domestic values, and simply knowing how to treat a man.

So the next time you hear a man say that a good woman is hard to find, don’t be so quick to jump on the defensive end. Instead think about your girlfriend who complains about everything under the sun or your friend who is lugging around baggage from a high school relationship that happened years ago. Then evaluate those qualities that you need to work on, not only for a man, but for yourself.

What are your thoughts?

To all the mighty lions out there! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEO'S!

This dramatic, creative, and outgoing sign has the keyword "magnetism" for good reason. Fiery and self-assured, it can be almost impossible to resist the Leo's charm. Whether it's time spent with family and friends, or efforts on the job scene, a Leo is going to bring much to the table.

Friends and Family
By far the most generous of the Zodiac, Leos make loyal and giving friends. They'll go out of their way to help, even when it conflicts with their own schedule. The Leo is a strong, confident personality who has the ability to make almost everyone comfortable. Unassuming and gracious, they love to host parties and events. The Leo is rarely found alone - interacting is second nature. Close friends are chosen for their ability to keep up with the Leo's energy, along with a strong sense of dignity and a commitment to individual values. When family is involved, the mighty Lion will do whatever it takes to defend their loved ones. Loyalty for the Leo means a lifetime. They pride themselves on being there for family through thick and thin.

Career and Money
Leos are doers. "I will" is the key phrase for this sign. There's a lot of energy packed into this sign, and they're always going to be busy, regardless of whatever else is happening around them. They are ambitious, creative, and optimistic. It's not enough to just do the job for a Leo. In order to suffice, it must be done to the absolute best of their ability. Once committed to an employer, they will go all out, but the best situation for the Leo is to be their own boss.

Careers that allow for the Leo's dramatic flair, such as acting and entertaining, are ideal. Such positions give the Lion free reign. Other occupations such as management, teaching, and politics are well-suited too. Anything that puts a Leo in a leadership position will give this sign the opportunity to do what comes naturally to them.

Leos love to surround themselves with the things they fancy. Since money usually comes readily to the Leo, there's always more where that came from. "Money is meant to be spent" as far as this sign is concerned - and spend they will. Generous in spirit, a Leo will give away their last dollar to help a friend out. They're always confident that there will be more, and there usually is. There's never a lack of work for a Leo. In fact, there's generally more work available to them than they can keep up with.

Love and Sex *
This fiery sign is passionate and forthright with their affections. When it comes to sex, you can expect the Leo to be adventurous, fun, and highly energetic. There is a definite line of division between sex and love for Leos. Mates are chosen for their willingness to allow the Leo to take the lead, shine brightly and be independent. They look for uninhibited lovers who aren't self-conscious. As accepting as the Leo is, a mate needs to be an intellectual equal to cut the mustard. Leos are loving, fun, and very giving to those in their personal life.

 Wanda you are so right ALL of this is me!

"A Reason A Season and A Lifetime"

Have you ever gone through some things in you're life, and you read something that makes all the sense in the world to you? This can help you through a difficult time in your life! That's how I feel every time I read this poem! I hope you understand the meaning of this poem, because people always come into your life for a reason, a season and a lifetime.  When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do!

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly.  They have come to assist you through a difficulty, or to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or even spiritually.  They may seem like a Godsend to you, and they are.  They are there for a reason, you need them to be.

Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.  Sometimes they die, Sometimes they just walk away.  Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand.  What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.  The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.  They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.  They may teach you something you have never done.  They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.  Believe it!  It is real!  But, only for a season.  And like Spring turns to Summer and Summer to Fall, the season eventually ends.

Lifetime, relationships teach you a lifetime of lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a slid emotional foundation.  Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas in your life.  It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.  Thank you for being part of my life....

BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND! When a Threesome goes wrong!

My friend Kendra and Daniel were together for over nine years, and for years they had talked about having a threesome.  Kendra, however, was always the one who was very reluctant to move forward.  Daniel would buy porn movies and go on porn sites trying to share this with Kendra in the hopes of one day changing her mind about a threesome.  Kendra would often try to explain to Daniel that she wasn’t comfortable with the entire threesome thing.  She also felt that if she were ever with a woman, this would mean that she was bi-sexual or gay.  Kendra was never attracted to women, and Daniel knew this.  After a while Daniel started acting funny and coming home late just tripping!  Kendra would call anybody who would listen to her about Daniel and their problems.

   Kendra knew that on their 10th anniversary they needed to do something they had never done before, and she knew exactly what that was going to be!  Kendra thought about asking one of her closest girlfriends if they wanted to join her and Daniel, but she knew that wouldn’t be a smart move.  Then she started looking online for all swingers sites, and she started reading the couples’ profiles.  Kendra started to notice everybody on the sites looked clean and sane.  She couldn’t believe such a world existed, and she had two months to put this plan in motion!  She started thinking about the type of woman Daniel was attracted to, and it didn’t take her long to figure out that if her man could have any woman, it would be Jennifer Lopez.  There was no way in hell that she could make that happen, so she started thinking about finding this type of woman online.

   Kendra registered on one of the swingers sites, went online,  Googled a picture of a woman, and posted it on the site as herself. After she registered online, it didn’t take long for her to get her first hit.  It was from a 200-pound lady!  Kendra got a big kick out of that one, but, of course, that wasn‘t what she was looking for.  She immediately started looking for a Latino woman, and it didn’t take long until she found one – 5’4,” 135 pounds, and single, with a cute face and what looked like a BIG ASS!  The Latina hottie went by the name of  “Hot & Spicy.”  Kendra sent Hot & Spicy a flirt.  Two days went by, and Kendra hadn’t heard from her, but, on the third day, she finally got a message from her.  Hot & Spicy wanted to get to know Kendra and asked if she could meet with her.  This took Kendra off guard, because she didn’t think this was all going to happen so fast.

   Kendra sent Hot & Spicy an e-mail letting her know that she wanted to talk on online a little bit more before they met.  Hot & Spicy agreed, and they both talked online for a week.  Kendra found herself really liking Hot & Spicy.  She found her to be a very cool and down to earth chick.  Kendra even forwarded the Latina hottie her real picture, and she told her all about Daniel.  Kendra and Hot & Spicy finally agreed it was time for them to meet.  Kendra found herself very nervous about finally meeting this Latina hottie.  She found herself worrying about what she was going to wear and how she looked.  This really shook Kendra, but she knew she had to stop thinking about that and move forward with the plan.

   Kendra made sure she was at the restaurant before Hot & Spicy. Once seated at the hotel, she found herself looking at every woman walking through the door.  Finally, she saw her “date” walking through the door, and it was as if the Red Sea had parted and the spot- light was on her.  It seemed like Hot & Spicy was on the runway! Kendra had never looked at any chick like that before, but she couldn’t help herself.  All eyes were on Hot & Spicy, and she knew that shit too!

   Once Hot & Spicy walked up to the table, it was like she and Kendra were old friends just meeting for a nice dinner.  Kendra couldn’t stop staring at Hot & Spicy, but the Latina hottie didn’t act like she cared one bit!  Their conversation just flowed, and Kendra learned even more about Hot & Spicy, whose real name was Angel. Finally Kendra brought up the true reasons why they were there. Kendra told Angel all about her and Daniel and what she wanted to do for their 10th anniversary.  Much to Kendra surprise, Angel was eager and ready to do this, like that evening!

   Kendra explained to Angel she had never been with a woman before, and there were a couple of things she wanted to get straight and lay a few ground rules before they continued this.  Kendra had  come to realize that she preferred to be the “Pillow Princess.”  She had found this term on the swingers’ site.  This means that Kendra wouldn’t touch Angel, and Angel would do all the work as Daniel watched.  Also, Angel could not kiss or touch Daniel.  Kendra could see that Angel had a crazy look on her face.  After Kendra gave Angel all the rules to their impending threesome, Angel then told Kendra she was cool with all of that, because she gets off on watching a woman who has never been with another woman before lose her mind with one of the best orgasms she has ever had!  And it would be an added bonus to have Daniel there to watch what she could do to his women.  Hell, maybe he would even learn a few things!



   Kendra had everything planned out so well for that special evening. She was lucky and got a suite at one of the best hotels in town.  She made reservations at her and Daniel’s favorite restaurant.  She brought a fly ass dress and matching panty and bra set.  She wore her best perfume and got her hair done.  She couldn’t wait for Daniel to arrive and see her.  Once Daniel got home she was right - he loved how good she looked.  She told him to pack a bag with a suit so they could get to the hotel.  Daniel was so happy, and he couldn’t believe that Kendra went all out for their anniversary.

   Kendra was going to tell him about Angel at the hotel, but she decided to wait until they got to the restaurant to tell him.  After the waiter gave Daniel his birthday cake, she told him what was to come next.  She told him all about Angel and also about the rules for the evening.  Daniel could barely get past Kendra being down for this PERIOD!  He said he didn’t care if she wanted to tie him to a chair just so long as he could watch.  Kendra wished she had thought about that before now, but it was too late, and she had to move forward with the plan.  She knew that, around this time, Angel was on her way to the hotel, so they had to get back there soon.  During the ride to the hotel, Daniel had millions of questions about the other woman.  All Kendra told him about Angel was that she was “ hot & spicy”! Kendra had never seen Daniel so happy before!

   Once at the hotel, Daniel ran and took a shower – he was singing in there and laughing the whole time.  Kendra took off her dress and put on her silk bathrobe – she still had on her matching bra and panty set with her 4 inch heels.  She felt so sexy and ready for this evening. Daniel came out of the shower with his dick rock hard.  He grabbed Kendra and gave her a big kiss.  Then, there was a knock at the door. Daniel had this silly sick look on his face, and it was then that Kendra knew she had to take two shots of the whiskey she had brought.  When she opened the door Angel was standing there in a skin-tight backless red dress and 4 inch pumps!  Her hair was straight and parted in the middle.  Angel had the reddest lipstick Kendra had ever seen. She smelled like some sweet fruit, and her perfume filled the entire room.

   Daniel was standing there about to faint.  His month was wide open, and his eyes were as big as two quarters.  Kendra could’ve smacked the shit out of him standing there looking all retarded, but even she had to admit that Angel was HOT!  Kendra introduced Angel to Daniel, who by this time had gotten himself together somewhat.  By the time they had all had two shots apiece, Kendra was fucked up and ready.  She was so horny, and Daniel felt like he had died and gone to heaven!  Angel took over the evening.

   Angel had moved the hotel chair to the corner of the room where the chair was facing the bed.  She looked at Kendra to guide Daniel off the bed to the chair.  Somehow, Kendra caught on, took Daniel by the hand and lead him to the chair.  Daniel whispered in Kendra’s ear how much he loved her, and he kept saying, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”  Angel walked over and said to Daniel, “I’m now about to show you how to make your girl cum very hard, so if I were you, I would take some notes.” Daniel was so caught up in the moment he couldn’t give a shit what this fine ass chick said!

   Angle took Kendra by the hand and laid her near the edge of the bed.  She started kissing her neck and whispering in her ear.  Kendra was so fucked up she couldn’t believe how good she felt, and she looked over to her side to see Daniel.  He was sitting there just rubbing himself and staring right into her eyes.  This is what she wanted for her man, and she could see this was only going to make them stronger.  Angel worked her tongue around Kendra nipples, gently biting them.  She started putting her finger inside Kendra, and Kendra felt like she was going to explode.  All she was thinking about was Daniel.

   Slowly, Angel made it down to Kendra’s punani, and she was eating her like a champ!  Angel positioned herself so she could watch Daniel as she ate his woman.  Daniel was sitting there losing his mind.  He wanted in so bad, and from the corner of the room he kept begging Angel to let him get some.  Angel just smiled and kept eating Kendra. Kendra came so hard she felt like she was going to pee on herself.  She got up and ran into the bathroom.  She was so drunk she threw up in the bathroom all over the toilet and the floor.  Once she was done she hopped into the shower.  This made her feel a little better, but when she got out of the shower, she heard all of these noises as if someone was having great sex.  Coming out of the bathroom, she looked at the hotel bed and saw Daniel eating and fucking the shit out of Angel.

   Angel pushed Daniel off of her, got on top, and started riding the hell out of him.  Daniel was screaming like a cat in heat!  Kendra’s mind was racing – she couldn’t believe this shit was going down right in front of her.  Daniel and Angel looked at her and stopped for a second.  Angel even winked at her before continuing to fuck the shit out her man!  Kendra didn’t know what to do, so she packed her things and left them there.

DAMN!

1. Do you feel like Daniel and Angel were wrong, or was Kendra only
    getting what she deserved?

2. If you were Kendra, what would you have done?

'I love my children. I hate my life.' Do you agree?

I am always on the lookout for interesting stories or articles and today I found one. I would love to hear your thoughts about this article, you can leave me a comment or you can also e-mail me at theessenceofone@gmail.com .

If your having issues viewing the video you can always click on web link.
http://community.polls.todaymoms.com/_question/2010/07/15/4678455-i-love-my-children-i-hate-my-life-do-you-agree?GT1=43001
my-children-i-hate-my-life-do-you-agree?GT1=43001

In the recent New York Magazine cover story "I Love My Children. I Hate My Life," writer Jennifer Senior tackles the tough topic of parental happiness. She writes that while many parents say raising a child is a privilege that adds meaning to their lives, research shows parents are often more depressed and less happy than nonparents.
Her article set off a firestorm in online message boards in and blogs, with many critical of those who felt dissatisfaction with raising a child.
"Parenting is a selfless and lifelong vocation, and you must recognize that fact before you commit to becoming a parent," "judithod" commented on the article on nymag.com.
Others tried to figure out the root of the unhappiness.

The Motherlode's Lisa Belkin argues it may be connected it to the "helicopter parenting" phenomenon.
"Now that parenting has become a verb — an active, measurable, competitive thing — it brings with it an infinitely expanding job description. We create one for ourselves, different from our neighbors’, or even our partners’, but always broader than the ones our parents used decades ago. We recognize it as helicoptering when we see others do it, but from the inside it feels like what a good parent does." she writes. "And it is, in part, what is making us overwhelmed and unhappy.

Stephanie Wilder-Taylor suggested unhappiness could stem from unreasonable expectations. "I think the problem is how you go into parenting with these high expectations. It's supposed to be fun every minute of the day and it's such a rude awakening," she said. "Getting those kids dressed in the morning can sometimes be an extremely tedious experience. Unlike other jobs, you don't ever really punch out."
Click here for the TODAY video where Senior and psychotherapist Gail Saltz discuss the controversial article.

Results with 236 short comments

Total of 12,802 votes

35%

Yes. I do love my children, but I can't say I'm happier than I was before having them.

4,483 votes

33.1%

No. Having kids is hard, but the joy they bring is immeasurable.

4,233 votes

31.9%

Most of the time. I tell people that being a parent is the hardest job you'll ever have, but it's also the most rewarding.

4,086 votes

Yes. I do love my children, but I can't say I'm happier than I was before having them.

I luv my kids, but would luv 4 my hubby 2 keep them and let me go live my life! I feel as if I am missing out on life b/c of them.

Some help for the single man dating a single mother!

For many of us, dating someone with kids will occur at one point or another. When you eventually meet someone that has children from a previous relationship, it's important that you know what to expect and realize that this may have an affect on your relationship in the future.

Most kids find it difficult to accept the fact that their parent is dating. Therefore, it’s crucial that you make an honest effort to get to know their children and spend quality time with them. If the relationship escalates, talk to the children about how they feel about your relationship with their parent. Another important thing to consider is the impact of their ex on your relationship. This person will always be in your significant other's life because they bore children together; this infused a lasting bond between them. Before you get involved, decide whether this is something that you can deal with continuously.

If for whatever reason things don’t work out between the two of you, make sure that the kids don’t get hurt as a result. When you decide to break it off, you should both sit down with the children and explain the situation to them. If you choose not to, some kids might think that you ended the relationship because of them and this can negatively affect their self esteem.

When it comes to being in a relationship with a single parent, there are tons of benefits. Not only do you gain someone you love, but you also get beautiful children as well. At the same time, it can also be emotionally-draining.By communicating with your partner and their children, you can develop a healthy relationship and possibly grow to become a family.

Thank you Kevin and good luck with your new relationship, your going to do just fine! I told you dating a single mother would change your life forever! WOW LOOK AT YOU! ;op